Beauty is in the eyes...

I was lucky enough to get to photograph a beautiful wedding this weekend. I just love this picture..

One Year Anniversary...

"Healing takes courage, and we all have courage, even if we have to dig a little to find it."

Today is my one year anniversary since my first knee surgery. After 4 surgeries. 2 Staph infections, kidney failure, blood clots in my lungs, portable IV for six months, wound vac for 5 months, and many tears, I am finally on my way to healing. I am able to walk good, using the treadmill often, I can shower and dress myself too! I was in a Wheel chair for months as well. I am so happy to be enjoying my life again. Yes, I still have limitations but I am healing, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

I thank all of those who were there to help me during this whole process, I really could not have done it without you. I appreciate the fact I can now look back and laugh at times that I could only cry.

I can now say, that there was a time in December that I honestly was not certain I was going to survive. I was very sick and very tired. If it were not for my friends, family, and loved ones, I am not sure what my outcome could have been.

I am not into blaming anyone for what happened and the results from after surgery. I am focused on healing and moving on. I survived more than I ever thought I could. I learned a lot about myself and my inner strength.

I am so happy now, although I am not fully healed, I am on my way to normal again. I am thankful for that and am looking forward to my continued healing.

Thanksgiving...

And so we give thanks...
I have been looking forward to this day for weeks, as it is one of my favorite holidays. I spent last weekend with my kids and we celebrated early. We cooked a turkey, potatoes, gravy, etc the whole works. It was so nice to have my kids under one roof enjoying their laughs, their stories, and their company. I had a wonderful time and was very thankful for the time we had. Although no one really talked about it there was one thing on everyone’s mind, that tinge of excitement in the air, but be happy and celebrate... Do we dare?

The week continued, I drove home, Tony went back to Portland and back to work, Veronica and Seth returned to their normal schedule. Monday came and went, lots of questions with no answers. Tuesday, preparing to have Thanksgiving with great friends, baked, prepared, drank wine, felt anticipation beginning to boil. Wednesday... Very quiet all day, anticipation ... What was I so excited for? Was it for Thursdays feast with friends, or was it something else... Something so much more important to me.

Finally the answer came, Good news! What a feeling, so much love felt for the unknown.

Today was Thanksgiving; I have so much to be thankful for. As I busily scurried around the house preparing for the day, my mind was on only one thing.

I made a little gift for our hostess today as well as some table center pieces, I think they turned out pretty well, however note to self "hot glue is hot." Went to my friends for the festivities, so many people so much food. Lots of stories going on between everyone, I felt as though I was in a foreign location, although of course everyone was speaking English, I could not make out any conversation as there was so many. Loud laughs, yelling at TV (football of course) I realized although I love my time with my friends, I really enjoy my quiet home to myself. Finally it was time to eat. Where to begin with all of this food, filled my plate beyond the needed level and quickly gobbled it up as though I had not eaten for days. It was all very good, but wow, my stomach did not deal well with the sudden flood of overeating. Passed up dessert, and kindly thanked my hostess for her welcoming me into her home on this special day.

I am home now and quietly reflecting on the past few days, and dreaming about what will be coming in the future. Life is full of blessings daily. It is so important to remember to stop and take the time to enjoy what is going on around you and look for the good in all things even when sometimes it is hard to see the good. I am feeling truly blessed and am looking forward to the future.

Dedication...

"I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday."

Although I have been fairly consistent with my commitment to walking everyday on the treadmill, I will admit I have missed some days in the past. My commitment to myself was for the month of November I will walk everyday and give it my all each time. Although today is only the 5th. I have been doing very well. I notice that my energy level is increasing daily, my knee is feeling pretty good and my scale is throwing numbers at me that I am happy about. I know it is early and I have a lot of work to do, but every step is one step closer. I will keep you updated :)

I have been thinking about what I can do to "give back" this holiday season. I have come up with a fairly simple idea and I will blog about it once I begin. I am calling it "The 12 Days of Christmas" Pretty original huh?

We are moving into my favorite time of year. I am thankful that I am healthy enough to be able to spend time with my children, friends, family, and loved ones. I am looking forward to start decorating, baking, cooking, visiting, etc. I do not have any real traditions for the season.. Who knows, perhaps this will be the year to start one...

Determination

Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough!!

It has been a month and a half since I moved out on my own. I would definitely say there are pros and cons. I love having my own space, my own thoughts, and the ability to relax and enjoy my quiet time. I am a very independent person and enjoy my self much more. On the other side, I do on occasion get lonely. I look forward to visiting with others, and I appreciate the help I am still getting when it is needed. We will see what the future holds.

I have dove into my photography and am really enjoying it. The word is getting out and I have a few clients now! I am looking forward to seeing where this new adventure in my life takes me.

I have settled into my new home, and although I am not a big Halloween fan I did decorate the home this year. We also carved our pumpkins, and Lyle handed out candy for me. I do not like costumes and especially masks. I am glad he was here to help me.

I received some fantastic news in October and I am so excited to watch this news blossom into a reality.

November is a month of Thanks. I am very thankful for so much in my life. I am not sure there are enough days in the month for me to mention them all, but I am surely going to try. I am looking forward to spending time with good friends and family. Sharing stories and thoughts, laughs and ideas.

No Beans Allowed

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. ~Buddy Hackett

Today I made my first batch of Chili... It was ok, I seriously hate beans so they were not included in my recipe. It smelled good, looked great, but tasted kind of like burrito meat from Taco Bell. I guess it might taste better wrapped up in a tortilla. To add some flavor I added some cheese and sourcream to my bowl and ate it with tortilla chips. It basically tasted like a taco salad without the lettuce.. ugh. Now I have a whole pot of this stuff that I am not too wild about. I think next time I want to make something new, I will think twice.

Goodbye Summer

Goodbyes are not forever.
Goodbyes are not the end.
They simply mean I'll miss you
Until we meet again!



Tomorrow is the first day of Autumn. The summer is ending too soon, however I will say that I do love the smell and colors of Fall. My leg is finally healing, and I am getting around a lot better. I started taking my interests in photography to a new level and am excited to see where it leads me. I have made a decision in my life to move back into town on my own. Although I sincerely appreciate all the help I have received in the past several months with my leg surgeries, I feel that I am at a point in my life that I must again learn to do things on my own and find the independency that I once was so proud of. I have moved my animals with me, Mo and Sammi are adjusting well. Bella is doing well also, however she does divide her time between being in town with me and out in the country with Lyle. I had the opportunity to take a couple camping trips this summer and a few trips to the coast, although I wish I could have done more, I am grateful that I was healthy enough to finally get out and experience the activities that I enjoy once again. I am looking forward to my new adventures coming this Fall and Winter, and am excited to visit future pumpkin patches, holiday bazaars, winter festivals, Thanksgiving dinner with family and friends as well as Christmas time with those close to me.